For Autism Families

S for Script. The A to Z of Conscious Living

A to Z S
Script

Who are we when we are not ourselves?

We come into this world with just the fear of falling and loud noises. Everything else we learn. We are born, get given a name and from that moment on the script of that character with that name starts to develop. Each day we are told things, we experience others behaviours, we are punished and rewarded for doing and saying certain things, our parents, peers, teachers and everyone else adds a bit to the script everyday as we learn to play our character out on the stage of our life.

In our early years our values and key beliefs form which become the foundation of our future identities. As we grow into teenagers and then into adults, our script is being updated each day with every experience and influence.

But this is just our script. This is the role and character we are playing out. It isn’t all that we are. In fact our script is the part of us that isn’t who we really are. It’s just our character on the stage. At our core and in our soul we are pure love, yet some of the things we say and do do not come from that place.

Our script is not who we are. We are not our script.

We know this because when we are feeling sad we can ask ourselves “what would I choose? If I could be either happy or sad what would I choose?” I would choose happy, yet I am sad, so I know now that at that point I am not choosing, my script is.

Imagine a high pile of papers, millions of pages written with the details of how to be our character. It is titled with our name and it spells out exactly what someone would have to do, believe, think, and experience to be us. That is our script that we carry around with us every day and we believe we have to follow it word for word. When we encounter a situation, let’s say someone makes a comment about our appearance, we search the script and on page 1,345,736 we see how our script chooses to respond.

In order to get to know who we really are, and dare to believe we are not who we think we are, let’s just assume that the script is all that we don’t like, don’t want and wouldn’t choose for ourselves, and our true self is everything minus that script.

This liberates us as now we can separate out the parts of us we see and feel as not being congruent and authentic. Our script has been telling us all along that we are what it says we are, and the things we’ve done and said that we don’t like came from us, which has made us feel unhappy about ourselves. The low confidence, the rock bottom self-esteem, feelings of unworthiness – we believed that was who we really were.

Now we can go forward knowing that we are good, worthy, confident and everything else that we would choose to be. We are that pure human being without all the crap that has been laid on us and told to believe in. From today we take another path.

However, the script will always accompany us wherever we go. We can’t just dump it. It will pop up as that voice in our head whenever we are tired, challenged, out of routine and whenever possible will catch us unawares and try to take us back to believing in it. When it’s been rumbled it gets scared and will do its utmost to survive in our minds, so we need to stay awake, raise our consciousness every day and slowly release its grip.

We are not our script. We are not the opposite of our script, we are simply the absence of our script.

Whenever you become aware that the script might be in control of your thoughts, or to know who is in charge at any time, just ask yourself one question: “what would I choose?”

With love and gratitude

Nadine.
Founder & CEO, The Autism Directory
Professional Coach to Parents of a Child with Autism

Change Your Life Forever. Click here to find out how you can spend some private time with Nadine.

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